A Father Is a Father

At its core, the key argument against same-sex marriage is that it prevents our society from creating any distinction between relationships that are plainly different in significant ways. Men and women are different, and when they pair up, their intimate relationship has consequences that no other form of relationship has. Moreover, an ideal doesn’t have to apply absolutely in every case for it to remain valuable for society to be able to describe and uphold it.
Such were the thoughts to come to mind when reading that fathers make a difference in their children’s lives, and that fatherhood is in decline:

While it is well known how important a father’s involvement is to healthy child development, a very interesting and lesser known finding comes from a 26-year longitudinal study which says that the strongest factor indicating whether children practiced high levels of empathic concern for others in their adult years was whether they had an involved father in their life. In fact, father care was a stronger indicator here than the three strongest maternal factors combined! The study explained, “These results appear to fit with previous findings indicating that pro-social behaviors such as altruism and generosity in children were related to active involvement in child care by fathers.”

This does not in the least gainsay the important of mothers. It does, however, suggest that we oughtn’t dramatically modify the cultural institution — marriage — that marks as uniquely desirable the family units that bring mothers and fathers together.

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Tommy Cranston
Tommy Cranston
10 years ago

The progressives hate that God is a bigot-no child will EVER have 2 fathers or 2 mothers.
Ever.

ANTHONY
ANTHONY
10 years ago

The great architect (GOD) has a framework for humans and the universe itself. We as a society attempt to play god with disastrous results. An absent father leads to anger in kids…witness the rise of gangs. Mom and Dad bring different elements to a relationship….it was meant to be as defined by the creator. We can alter the framework and shall bear the consequences.

bella
bella
10 years ago

As a Catholic, I believe God is more concerned that a child has two loving parents than what gender those two parents happen to be.

mangeek
mangeek
10 years ago

Having two dads sounds pretty awesome to me. I suspect we’ll see an uptick in adoptions if gays were allowed to marry, and that’s A Good Thing.
I suspect ‘traditional marriage’ as we know it started more as a way to prevent massive social unrest caused by alpha-males hoarding all the women, and as such, I don’t see how allowing alternate marriages would affect the picture in today’s developed world.

Tommy Cranston
Tommy Cranston
10 years ago

“Having two dads sounds pretty awesome to me. I suspect we’ll see an uptick in adoptions if gays were allowed to marry, and that’s A Good Thing.”
Ask those 4 little boys in Bristol who got raped by the two perverts the state turned them over to on a silver platter if it is “A Good Thing” to feed little boys to unrelated freaks and tell the boys “these are your fathers, do whatever they tell you to do” for their perverted sexual gratification.
The more I see of this issue the more I see on this issue the more sympathy I have with the Saudi, Nigerian and Iranian treatment of this issue.
Maybe they are onto “A Good Thing”?
LOL

Justin Katz
Justin Katz
10 years ago

Mangeek,
Having two fathers might (or might not) be the best possible circumstance available for a particular child. Having a constantly churning household of a mother and boyfriends could be really cool from certain perspectives if they’re decent men.
The point is that having the biological mother and father raise the children that they create is and ought to remain the ideal. That other arrangements might work in specific cases doesn’t mean that we should negate our ability to recognize that ideal.
I do love this, though, as an example of the folly of progressive thought:

I suspect ‘traditional marriage’ as we know it started more as a way to prevent massive social unrest caused by alpha-males hoarding all the women, and as such, I don’t see how allowing alternate marriages would affect the picture in today’s developed world.

Yeah, you suspect a particular initial reason for marriage as we know it, and — disregarding all of the culture that we’ve built on that institution in the millennia between — you think it’ll be just dandy to switch it around.
Suppose polygamy comes fast on the heals of same-sex marriage. We’ll then have alpha males hoarding wives again, on top of the possibility of women marrying each other for the convenience and thereby leaving an underclass of unmarried men who aren’t interested in “alternate marriages.” That may not be certain, but I’d say it’s as plausible as the after-school diversity special that you’re envisioning.

bella
bella
10 years ago

I don’t think St. Paul anticipated Warren Jeffs, or other hetero fundamentalist abusers of all religions. Bad parents come in all shapes, sizes and sexual orientations, as do good ones.

Justin Katz
Justin Katz
10 years ago

I’m curious: Are you consciously dodging the point that I made, or is that really your approach to rational thought?

Warrington Faust
Warrington Faust
10 years ago

Posted by bella
“I don’t think St. Paul anticipated Warren Jeffs, or other hetero fundamentalist abusers of all religions. Bad parents come in all shapes, sizes and sexual orientations, as do good ones.”
Probably true, but who is to be blamed for attempting to narrow the odds.
Another point on Gay marriage, that means adoption. While seldom mentioned, it is widely known that a very large percentage of adoptions “fail”. That means the kid ends up in a foster home.

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