Mr. Subliminal Must Have Written the EG Teachers “Open Letter”

I know Dan Yorke has been giving this some play this afternoon, but I honestly thought the same thing when I stumbled across this “open letter” from East Greenwich Teachers to the public. Namely, it’s not a good idea to imply that you–the teachers–are better at raising the kids than their parents. Especially this part in which I’ve provided–in honor of Kevin Nealon’s Mr. Subliminal–an interpretation of what they’re really saying:

We were there when your children forgot their lunch money {because you didn’t care enough to double-check} and we made sure they ate {when you’d have let ’em starve}. We were there when your children didn’t have a ride home {deadbeats}, and we made certain they were safe {lucky we didn’t call DCYF}. We were there when your children called us at 10pm {where the hell were you?} because they didn’t know where else to turn for help {because you are unsympathetic and uncaring parents}. We have been here from their first day jitters through their post-graduate plans {more than you, even}.

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16 years ago

Yes but can the kids in EG’s public schools find the United States on a world map? lol
Condescending fools!

16 years ago

Besides absurdly condescending, the whole tone of the letter is “hey parents, we’ve been doing all the stuff you’re supposed to be doing for your kids, so sit down, shut up, and do what we say if you know what’s good for you!” It’s right out of “How to Make Friends and Influence People.”

16 years ago

Excellent, Marc.

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