G.I. Joe–“A Real American Hero”–is now based in Brussels. That’s what Hasbro and Paramount have decided as they seek to bring a new GI Joe movie to the big screen. (h/t)

Who needs A Real American Hero? Not Paramount or Hasbro it seems. The studio’s live-action feature film version of G.I. Joe will no longer revolve around a top-secret U.S. special forces team but rather an international operation.
In a follow-up to their confirmation that Stephen Sommers will direct G.I. Joe, Variety offers this new description of the team: “G.I. Joe is now a Brussels-based outfit that stands for Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity, an international co-ed force of operatives who use hi-tech equipment to battle Cobra, an evil organization headed by a double-crossing Scottish arms dealer. The property is closer in tone to X-Men and James Bond than a war film.”
Wow. A Real Globally Integrated Hero! Can we assume that this “double-crossing Scottish arms dealer” is Destro since he was one in the comics? And does that mean there will be no Cobra Commander in it?
So why the changes? Hasbro and Paramount execs recently spoke about the challenges of marketing a film about the U.S. military at a time when the current U.S. administration and the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan are at a low-point in global polls. When a studio makes a film as expensive as G.I. Joe will likely be, they want to know that as many people as possible around the world will want to see it. In other words, G.I. Joe — “A Real American Hero” — is a tough sell.

Gee, you’d think that the Hasbro’s Corporate headquarters was in a Blue state…Well, at least this proves that all big corporations are led by evil, money-grubbing conservatives, right?