Wanted: Everything You Aren’t, for Nothing You Understand
Just to see what’s going on out there, I ran a Monster.com job search for the first time in years. I had forgotten how completely unqualified the ads can make you feel. That seems to be the result when corporate HR departments are given more twenty words to describe a job opening. A made-up example:
You are: a self-starting, autonomous copy-editing genius with fifty years of experience and the ability to follow instructions carefully. Passion for semiconductor technology a must. Fluency in more than half of the world’s spoken languages a plus.
Your responsibilities are: to conduct broad-based research for the creation of high-impact marketing, advertising, instructional, psychosomatic media and corporate packages (print and Web), translated into three programming languages and Pig Latin in a fast-paced environment emphasizing attention to detail.
We are: a completely unknown company, but the only organization hiring people with your skill set, just now.
Benefits revealed upon hire; salary commensurate with experience.